Wednesday, 2 July 2008

Love all god's creatures...















..except bastard seagulls.

That's all.

13 comments:

Thumper Plowman said...

I hate the buggers as well. I grew up in a fishing town and they were everywhere. It's difficult to develop any great fondness for a species that has shat on your head.

BPP said...

I'd add wasps to this list. Wasps and cats. Wasps, cats, and those daddy long leg fuckers. Wasps, cats, daddy long legs, and moths. And poodles.

Bastards, the lot of 'em.

Dominion said...

I can do nothing but agree. (nods head in relevant way)

John Q Wagonwheel said...

One of them fuckers landed on my head at the beach once. I slapped it off with my angry palm. Bastard.

BPP said...

I'm off on 'oliday to the North Yorkshire coast, so that'll be these buggers shitting on my head for a week. Why can't they be gassed? Them and their babaies? Eh?

BPP said...

Babaies?

Valentine Suicide said...

Actually, I believe Babaies is the correct word for the evil spawn of the bastard devil-bird.

Have a nice holiday. Are you off to Whitby? You need to watch out for Dracula groupies if you are..

BPP said...

I'm not going yet. When I do, I'm off to Staithes - just up the road from Whitby. No doubt we'll pop over to Whitby, unless we spend the whole holiday having mad, passionate sex ...

... so, yes, we'll be going to Whitby.

Dominion said...

And what prey, is wrong with Dracula groupies Sir....hmmmm?

Jon Peacey said...

I live near the most inland port in the country with what seems to be the largest landfill in Europe... Seagulls are everywhere! Bastard-devil-birds is about right. Shite-ing everywhere noisy critters! And they're vicious too! The CC has been oiling the eggs and nests in an attempt to rid us of their foul plague.

BPP: Our cats have taken down seagulls in the past... they've earned their spurs (or should that be wings)!

Ishouldbeworking said...

Seagulls should be wiped out. Every Thursday morning I put my bin-bag out for the dustmen, and within seconds one of those evil sods rips it open and distributes its contents all over my front step. AND, once, another one dive-bombed my mate John and sliced his scalp open with its beak. AND ALSO, they regularly wake me up at four in the morning with their horrible screeching. They're vile animals, vile.

But why should you be troubled, VS, living in land-locked Staffs?

John Q Wagonwheel said...

Plenty of 'em in Bath and the like. They aren't just seaside bastards, they're everywhere-bastards.

Valentine Suicide said...

A 'twunt*' of seagulls swarmed around my two year old niece and made her cry in St Ives whilst I was away. She's probably going to need years of therapy for 'Tippi Hedren Syndrome', ISBW, so I'll be in touch.
Another one of Lucifer's Flying Scab Minions (to give them there proper scientific name) bit (pecked?) my 4 year old nephew on the finger for the crime of trying to eat a pasty. I believe St Ives comes second only to Brighton for it's twunt populace?




*I think twunt is the collective name for a group of seagulls?

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