Saturday, 12 July 2008

My other blog is a Porsche.



I once started to write a post about the never ending inquest of Princess Diana. It had a crass joke in it about the Paps being able to follow her because of the 'Princess On Board' sticker on the back of the Merc. Haha. This originated from a general irritation after following a car with a 'Child on Board' sticker. When an opportunity to gently overtake this vehicle, with the merest caress of the accelerator so as not to wake the presumably slumbering infant, and obviously being ultra cautious so that the gentle lamb did was not poisoned by my passing exhaust fumes, I couldn't help notice that the mother driving that car was not only smoking, but also was failing to have an actual 'Child On Board'. Surely there should be a law ensuring that people take these stickers out of their cars, when they've dropped ths sprogs off, so I can drive like 'Twatbag' Clarkson?

Today I saw a black Fiat with an obligatory ego twatplate and a huge pink logo on the back informing me that this particular Italian rustbucket was 'Powered by Fairydust'.

Is it against the law to send my evil army of seagulls against these drivers?

Just asking?

8 comments:

Matthew Rudd said...

Go for it. I'll back you all the way.

Clair said...

I have a car sticker. It says 'I *heart* badgers', due to a very old story involving someone I used to buy features from, which isn't even funny any more.

BPP said...

I saw one that said 'Babe On Board' on the back of one of those new VW Beetle novelty cars. Needless to say, the creature driving the motor car was anything but a babe - unless the definition's changed from 'stunningly attractive woman' to 'obese ratbag with a face like a spanner chewing a bulldog crossed with a wasp's slapped arse'.

Berni1806 said...

By way of an antidote to the apparent saccharine sweetness of the hideous things, the 'Baby/Child on Board' stickers originally served a gruesomely practical purpose. They were designed to alert the emergency services to look for a kid if the car had been reduced to a smoking, twisted heap of metal and the adults on board to hairy strawberry jam. I don't think this works for the 'Babe/Princess/Self-Regarding, Unfunny Cunt On Board' ones, though. Unless, of course, they are meant to offer a heavy clue to the firemen/coppers/ambulancers that they should just let the occupant of said car die.

Five-Centres said...

I once surreptitiously stuck a 'hello sexy' waving hand in the back window of a neighbours' car. He was director of studies at a university and took himself very seriously. After that, his students did not.

He was unimpressed. I was banned from their house forever.

How we laughed.

BPP said...

Dog dirt's dirty stuff ain't it?

Geoff Prickett said...

Not wishing to bring religon into it, but I saw a the aftermath of a crash on the M25 and one of the cars had on it that irritating Christian fish symbol on the back -Obviously didn't work for them that time, did it?

caw said...

"obligatory ego twatplate"

*chortle* noice!

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